Wow, I had a very relaxing holiday season this year. It was so nice to take 2 weeks off with no fear that I was burning up all of my vacation! I just really relaxed. I told my friend R at the end of our NY trip I felt like I was in vacation mode. Sometimes it seems like it takes about a week to forget about work and just enjoy relaxing. Know what I mean?

Boy, looking back on 2006 I realize that some things didn’t end up happening as quickly as I had hoped. I still don’t have my Real Estate license. I passed the class. And the form to sign up for the test is sitting in my office. But I haven’t scheduled the test yet. Arg! One of my smaller 2006 goals sort of became irrelevant as new opportunities sprung up. But I think the fact that I quit the corporate world (which wasn’t on my list of goals for 2006) more than makes up for the things that I didn’t accomplish. I hate justifying it like that. But I do think it’s true.

Sometimes better opportunities pop up and you decide to exchange persuits that are less profitable for the new ones. That’s okay. You aren’t “giving up” on the less profitable ones. You’re just replacing them with better options. You’re just making your “success portfolio” richer. That’s smart.

Over the holiday a new thought occurred to me. I think I mentioned it briefly before here. But it really sunk in over the past couple of weeks. It’s the concept that I am a biz builder. I want to have my own collection of companies that I’ve built and run. I don’t care what kind of company it is (well, you know what I mean). I’m not limited to a software development company. I can learn any skill. It’s an interesting application of my “jack of all trades” tendency. Once I master something I get bored with it. I want a new challenge.

Right now I have my hands into 3 distinct fields. Software development, stock market and mortgage lending. This year will be different than any other of the past 10 years of my life. This year I will not make the majority of my money from doing technical work. My mortgage brokering biz will eclipse software development revenues this year. At least that’s how it looks now. I’ll keep some soft dev work going on the side. It’ll be a good backup plan, so to speak. But I’m going to push hard this year.

I don’t even have a clear plan yet. Probably because I’m in this stage where I’ve blasted off but I’m not sure how fast or high my rocket can go yet. I guess a good goal would be to just Hang on for dear life!

Okay, so I’ve talked to several people over the past few days who have, without realizing it, let me know that they’ve told other people about my blog. Yes, this very blog. And since I’m feelin’ so good this early Tuesday morning I figured that I’d share my thoughts about the purpose of this blog.

Ya ready? Honestly, I don’t have any grand purpose whatsoever. It started by me wanting to have a place post entries and pictures about my trip to Hawaii. “Trip to Hawaii?” you say? Yea, I’ve cancelled it for biz reasons. But since then I’ve enjoyed jumping on late at night to tell my tiny audience vartious random things I’ve been thinking lately. It started with just my family knowing about it. Now a few more people have discovered it. It even pops up in the top Google listings for various search terms. Want a laugh? Do a Google search for “lostwithme daryl” and see what comes up! The helpful little GoogleBot picked a wonderful little sentance from a random post that has to do with “hotties” and “rubbing”. That’s all I’m gonna say!!!!

So now that I’ve gotten off to a serious note with this entry I figured I’d share why I picked the title “Lost With Me”. First of all, it’s because I don’t want ANYBODY to take this blog seriously. If I’m practically admitting up front that I get lost all the time, that should clue you in that it may be hazardous to your health to follow any advice you find here. So I’m hoping when you read my posts you’re just relaxing and want a good laugh more than anything. I’m a peculiar guy with a different outlook on life. And I hope it’s entertaining. If you ever get offended or feel like your feathers have been ruffled by a post just take a deap breath. I promise I didn’t mean to offend you. Maybe I’m just blowing off steam or something. I get in moods sometimes. I promise you, if I ever met you we’d probably have a swell time.

Also, and this is a big one, I don’t have any single person in mind when I’m writing. So if you read something and thought to yourself, “I bet this is about me. ” You can bet your boots that I was not thinking about you. Sometimes I just come up with these broad generalizations and decide to tell the world how it ought to be.  Hey, here’s a tip . . . there’s this little red “X” at the top right of your browser window (if you’re a Mac person I have no clue what shiny little button is up there on your browser). Just click that button. If it makes you feel better you can even pretend that it instantly sends me an email that says, “Somebody was majorly ticked off with your insensitive post.” I promise I won’t do it again. [fingers crossed]. Hey, there are about 6 people in the whole world that have known me long enough to know that I’ll slip up and just run my mouth about some seemingly insensitive opinion of mine without realizing that if I was talking to anybody else they would probably take offense. They humor me when I do that. And I really appreciate it. Because they know I’m about as harmless as a BB-gun. It stings from time to time. But you gotta love the guts of somebody who’ll at least take a shot like that. Rest assured, after about 15 minutes I’ll realize what I said and maybe I won’t take the extra effort to qualify what I said, but nonetheless I do feel bad about it.

I really do. When I was in highschool (a christian highschool) I rarely felt bad about anything I said. After all, I had scripture to back it up, right? Of course! And my interpretation was ALWAYS correct! But since then I think I’ve mellowed a bit. I realize that anybody can think their interpretation is correct. Hey, whatever. You know, I think everything’s better when we both just realize that either of us could be right. Sure, we’ll find out someday who’s right. But let’s just be friends in the meantime. Hey, you could even be a tree-hugging Green Party member. Yo, it’s cool. We can be friends. I’ll laugh and nod my head agreeably when you talk about saving some wildlife by voting against some oil rig or someting. I just ask that you just be agreeable when I talk about how tax cuts are good for everybody too.

Maybe this blog ends up containing more than a few insightful entries, but always keep in mind: I’d probably like you if I met you. In fact, many times, I enjoy meeting somebody who’s belief’s are totally opposite of mine. It gives me a chance to ask questions and see if I have good answers to any of their responses. I may not voice them. But, to tell you the truth, I am very convinced about my convictions. And it’s wonderful! If you make a great arguement against something I believe in strongly, I really cheer you on! Wow! The way you voiced your opinion was very effective! On the other hand, if you make a strong stance for your opinion, occasionally I get special satisfaction from the knowledge that, even though I may not say anything, I know I’ve got all the ammo I need to blow you off the face of the universe.

So now that I’ve said that, I am 100% aware of what this blog could do. This blog could be the sole reason that people, 10 years from now, laugh and say something like, “I knew this really opinionated guy one time and you know what absurd statement he made about this topic?” I know. I know. That’s the downside about putting your thoughts out there for the public to have their way with. But you know what? That risk briefly flutters past my mind with every post I make. And each time I decide that it’s worth it to go ahead and leave whatever I say posted.

I fully realize that in 15 years I might look back on some of my entries and feel a little weird about them. I’ll think to myself, “Boy should I delete that post? I don’t really think like that anymore.” But I know I won’t delete it. Why? Because I hate censorship. I don’t like it when somebody changes their opinion and tries to convince everybody, “What , No. I never said that!!!” Yea right. Believe it or not every one of us has different beliefs than we did 15 years ago. Not every belief is different. Maybe even 90% of them are the same. But we will have lived a little since then and are willing to admit that we were a bit narrow-minded back then.

Ahh, anyways. I’m done talking about that. I think one word comes to mind now about the previous topic. What’s that word? “Exhausted.” Right. On to another topic now.

Yea, so when I’m writing a blog entry what are my surroundings like? Well there are several requirements, like having my trusty laptop nearby. But I almost always have some delecacy present. Yep, like right now, it’s my “Extra Sharp Cheedar Cheese”. I love that cheese. I’m not gonna lie, it’s Cracker Barrel brand. Right, you can find it in most grocery stores these days. I wish it was some gormet brand of cheese. But, alas, it’s all the goodness I need right now. Just nibbling and typing. Ahhhhh! It’s quite heavenly. The only item to add to my blog ambiance is some choice tunes. Nope, I’m not gonna tell you what’s playing over my reference studio-quality speakers right now. I’ll leave that up to your immagination. (Hint: No, it’s not rap.) Hahaha! That leaves a LOT of genre’s to guess from though!

Yea, Daryl’s world is a lot of fun. I really do enjoy my single life quite a bit. Why, you ask? Mostly because I’m in that male stage where I don’t feel like I deserve a girl yet. After all, I’m not making millions yet! What respecitable girl would feel at home with me if she couldn’t afford the best? So, I probably won’t feel good about dating till I’m making a boatload on the stock market and own at least 2 serious businesses. Like I was talking about with a friend tonight, “I’m not going to marry no ugly chick.” I’ve had several pretty x-girlfrieds. But unfortunately, I didn’t feel comfortable about my situation in life at the time I was dating them. So I’m still looking for a gorgeous girl. Are you a gorgeous girl? Are you single? Hey, wait, woah, woah. When I say gorgeous I don’t mean average. I mean drop-dead. I mean you have to use all of your feminine tactics every day to keep the guys off you. Like, you have had to change your cell number at least 2 times because you kept getting calls from guys you now put in the “stalker” category? Lol! Well, truthfully, I really like “cute” girls. I’m probably about 5′9″. So if you’re in the 5′0″ – 5′4″ range that is just perfect! Perfect for what, you ask? If you have to ask you’re obviously not a girl. Or you’re just a curious one ) What’s with girl’s always getting away with calling themselves “curious”? When guys do the same thing it’s called “nosy”. Grrr!

Boy, this post is quite the ramble, isn’t it? I always end up taking things to their limit. Ahh, sorry. Since I’m on the topic . . . Um. . . Second though  . . . Okay, well I’ll save that for another post. So nevermind. (sorry) Yea, well, I think I’ve run out of things to talk about.

So are you now convinced that you should just be in a lighthearted and fun mood when you read my blog? I hope so. See, I practically typed this whole entry in a single breath (figuratively speeking). It just flowed out. Boom, done!

I guess it’s just part of starting anything. There’s a lot of work up front. I’ve been a bit dissapointed lately knowing that I’ll be missing out on Thanksgiving with my family. I was supposed to have the most felxible schedule of all when I went into biz for myself. After all, if I want to take a month off for Thanksgiving why can’t I?

Well I found out why. You have to work up to it. You can’t just quit the corporate world and never work again. You quit the corp world put in several grueling years on your own biz(s) and then your the president with your employees running the show. Then you can take large amounts of time off with relatively small consequences.

The whole point isn’t to be able to take off anytime you want. The point is to be able to not work but nonetheless the money still flows in. Every bum across America takes every week off. The problem is that when he doesn’t work, he doesn’t eat either. When I get to where I need to be I can take a two month vacation and the flow of money doesn’t vacate for 2 months.

The real point of vacations for me will probably to focus on a new opportunity. I’d go crazy if I just sat on a beach for 2 months. I just cancelled a trip to Hawaii because I knew I’d be going crazy over there thinking about all the opportunities I’d be missing out on back here.

I’ve got a 3 year plan in the works right now. At the close of that 3 years I should be feeling much more free. But right now I’m fighting to get to that ultra-stable point. The fact is that as long as I am in ambitious mode I will be giving up things that I enjoy to achieve a goal. But that’s a choice I’m willingly making.

So now’s my chance to set a clear goal. I’ve been talking about the 3 year plan. But I’ve been talking about it for 2 months now. Most people talk about a 3 year plan for 3 years. In three years you talk to them and they are still working on the 3 year plan. Wait? Weren’t you talking about reaching your goal in 3 years 3 years ago? Yea.

I chuckle to myself when I talk to a particular casual friend of mine. He’s always talking about how life will be good in 5 years. Except that he’s been saying that for the past 2 years. So I guess he’s really on a 7 year plan. At least till next year. Then it’ll be an 8 year plan.

Here’s an overview of the timeline of my plan:

Year 1 (Oct 1 2006 – Oct 1 2007): This is when I’m fumbling around considering different biz opportunities and figuring out what I want to settle down and do for the next several years. At the end of this semi-awkward period I will have a clear list of biz goals and priorities that I’ll be honing in on and perfecting. I’ll finally have the car on the right road, so to speak.

Year 2 (Oct 2 2007 – Oct 1 2008): This year is when I buckle down and get many of my business process in place. This is when I get things set up to be scalable. I’d like to have more than one location and at least a copule of employees by this point.

Year 3 (Oct 2 2008 – Oct 1 2009): This is the year that I take all of the work that I did in year 2 and really put the petal to the metal. This is where I get my employees set up to handle things. By the end of Year 3 I should be able to either start another biz, continue growing my current bizs or step back. This is the point where I’d like to have a trustworthy person trained to do what I usually do.

So there you have it. The first 3 years shouldn’t change too much. But the next three could be a bit different from what I wrote above.

The cool thing is that this stuff is materializing. I’m not dreaming about things that I haven’t even started on yet. Everything that’s part of the plan is stuff I currently have in the works. I’ve already taken at least a few steps toward the goal. So this isn’t me hoping things come together. This is me knowing that things have already come together. I just need to push these opportunities.

I started writing this entry probably over a month ago. I was driving home from somewhere (I don’t even remember). I was so excited to get home and blog about My Recipe and such. I got home and started writing this. Then an email popped up and I got distracted. But I’m back to my ”My Recipe” entry now! I guess I’m just in a blogging mood. Lol! 

Okey dokey, I’m gonna take this opportunity to share with the world a valuable insight to the way my brain works and the way I communicate with my own self (which is what this blog is about). The way I motivate myself. I suppose that this entry will be quite lengthy. But don’t nestle in for a nice long read because you probably will get fed up with this entry before I’m done. This post can be summed up by one word: “opinionated and abrasive”. So if anything, you might want to get the Rolaids.

All right people. This entry really amounts to nothing. Know why? Because I’m not trying to start a religion with my blog. My blog is for me. My thoughts are for me. I made this thing public because I enjoy knowing that people can find out what I really think if they care to know. What does that do for me? It makes sure that I don’t go around acting like somebody I’m not. As I develop relationships with people I could put on an act. But I’ll be a bit more genuine if I know people can find out the “real” me when they hear about my blog from somebody.

So what does that have to do with “My Recipe?” Nothing it was basically a disclaimer. And, no, nobody said anything about my blog or about being offended by it or anything like that at all. I’m just writing this because I want to get it down in bits and bytes for the record.

So here’s My Recipe. My own personal recipe for navigating this world from birth to death. Note that I said that this is “MY” Recipe. I realize that this recipe suites my tastes. It probably doesn’t suit yours. Has anybody ever told you that it is wrong to not like the taste of some food? No. Think about it, “It’s a sin to not like chocolate.” How absurd. The thoughts in my blog are My Recipe. I don’t expect you to like my recipe. Nor do I think you are somehow stupid or dumb or making a mistake if you don’t follow My Recipe. My Recipe is for me.

So where am I getting the ingredients for My Recipe? I figure that if I want to be successful I need to learn from people who have been successful. So I’m seeking out people that are good at what I’m trying to do.

What am I trying to do? I’m not going to lie or cover it up at all. I’m trying to make millions and millions and millions. I’m talking about hundreds of millions of dollars. Some day I will hear about a CEO of some company getting a rediculous salary of $5 million and I’ll just smile to myself because that’s how much I made in the last month. Who in the world has dreams this big? Me. Why? Because people do it. Yes, it’s rare. But there’s no reason I can’t do this.

I’ve already taken some necessary steps to make sure I am on a path that can lead me to my goal. I quit my corporate job. That was the most important thing I’ve done since I graduated from highschool. I’ve taken two crucial courses (at my own expense) in the last couple of months. A Real Estate course and a Stock Market investing course. Who are the 3 most notable richest people alive today? Let’s see, Bill Gates, Warren Buffet and Donald Trump. What are their fields of expertse? Software, Stock Market Invsting and Real Estate.

And what are the 3 things I’m focusing on now? Software, Stock Market Invsting and Real Estate. You got it! Every wonder why I picked them? Because there are a lot of people who make millions in each. There aren’t really other fields where a true mint is being made these days. I want in on the millions. “The journey of a million miles starts with the first step.” Well my motto right now can be summed up by a similar statement. That statement is:

“The journey of a hundred million dollars begins with the first step.”

I am in training right now. I am learning what is out there. I may decide that Real Estate is not for me. Or that Software isn’t for me either. Or I may find a unique way to combine all 3 to form something powerful. Who knows how it will all pan out. But you’ve got to start somewhere.

I am also building a mentality. A rich person’s mentality. Why? Because I have to know what to do with money once I have it. The funny thing is that I am really working off of something I’ve had since I was a kid. My dad always used to say, “You’ve got wine taste and a beer budget.” And he was right. Someone recently also said, “Your way of looking at life is out of sync with your surroundings.” He’s totally right also.

Right now I think like somebody to whom money is no object. Yet my surroundings indicate that I am not made of money. In fact, I am not rich right now. But I totally understand that. I know that I’m “In launch mode” like a freind recently told me. I’m not in orbit yet. But at least I’m not sitting on the launch pad simply thinking about outer space. Or like other people who haven’t even built their rocket or even thought that they could even make it to outer space. No folks, I’m in my rocket, the flames are propelling me upwards.

Each of the past few months since I left the corporate world has taken me to a whole new level. It’s amazing. My goal is for that effect not to just to continue, but to compound. Each month gets it’s power added to the past months. Every month I can do more and make more $$$ than I could last month. I want to have record breaking months every month till I’m making a hundred million a year. Then I’ll put my rocket on auto-pilot.

So all of that is out of the way now. Here are the details of My Recipe. It’s actually quite simple.

The highest priority is learning to be a successful Stock Trader. This is the most important simply because it is “scalable”. When I learn the ropes I can do the same trade with $1,000 or with $10,000,000 and the technique is the same. Eventually this technique will become second-nature to me. In addition, I can trade stocks from anywhere in the world. There’s also the beauty of it being a simple one-man operation. Software and Real Estate both require cooperation with other people to make money.  The final and most compelling one is that I can make money in bear as well as bull markets. Secure, comfortable and exciting are some words that sum up what it’s like to be an expert in this field. Learning to be a successful trader is the foundation for my other pillars of success.

So that being said, my next priority is Real Estate. This is because I want to have the inside track on the most beautiful/valuable property that I can invest in. Investing in Real Estate is a great instrument for storing your wealth. There’s also another reason. Based on research I’ve done, the USA is headed toward a 20 year or so depression. It won’t be sudden like in 1929. It will be gradual, starting around the 2016 timeframe. During this time Real Estate will become very cheap. I want to “know the ropes” so I can be right on top of these great investment opportunities when they become common. Most people will be flat broke and struggling just to keep their head above water during this time. The people with the money will be able to have almost anything they want at a realtively inexpensive price. I want to be in position to be on the good side of that.

The third ingredient of My Recipe is Software Development. The main reason is simple. It’s how I am currently making good money. It is a field that I have become an expert in. I’m specialized in this field. If the stock market disappears and the USA turns into a Communist country where the government owns all property I’ll still be able to make good money with my software skills. Software is also a good way to lock in recurring income. If I’m able to capture a niche market or two with an e-commerce website of some sort that is money that keeps rolling in without me having to do much. I just hire some employees to maintain the biz and everything keeps running.

 _____________________

Okay, by now any normal christian person is thinking something along these lines, “Well . . . he sure thinks he’s invincible, doesn’t he? We’ll see what happens when the Lord decides he needs some humility and sends something his way that he doesn’t exepct. Then he’ll be in the same boat as all the rest of us. You know, there’s a reason that most people don’t think like that. It’s because it’s arrogant and unrealistic. You should have faith instead. Just trust the Lord. Let the Lord bless you. Don’t try to do everything your way. Like Cain in Genesis. He’s trying to use ‘the arm of the flesh’ to get what he wants. I won’t be a bit surprised if the Lord knocks him back on his butt at some point.”

Ahhhh, yep. I’ve dealt with this for years now. I don’t believe that the Lord is evil and is only looking for reasons to punish his children. “Look at that flat broke christian family with every sort of problem you can think of. The Lord must love them because he’s putting them through all those trials.” WHAT!!!! The first blessing he gave every human is also the most important one. YOUR BRAIN!!!

And I think he wants us to use it. The answer to most of the problems we encounter in life can be solved by simply taking a second or two to use OUR OWN BRAIN. There’s nothing “arm of the flesh” about that. God gave our brain to us to help us. After all we wouldn’t be able to read our Bible without it. We make dumb mistakes when we don’t use it. We end up in trials when we don’t use it. We never get out of our ruts when we become content to continue not using our brain. Some christians think it’s more virtuous to be a spiritual-vegitable. They are always playing the faith card. They talk about life in such impotent, helpless and pitiful terms. “Having faith” and plain laziness look very much alike these days. It’s too bad. God’s already given them the solution to their problems right between their ears. But they just want help the easy way. They want a blessing to be provided just because they had faith. That’s what I call looking for a holy handout. Or maybe we can call it the Wednesday Night Welfare program.

So I’m taking this brain God’s given me and am trying to use it to the fullest. I’m taking this body of mine and am going to work it hard and get the most out of it.

______________________________

Here’s the reason I’m doing all of this. The reason I want to be highly successful. The reason I want security, a comfortable lifestyle, and riches.

It all started in around 9th grade in High School. I realized that I had the same desire that Soloman had. I wanted wisdom more than anything else in the world. No, I didn’t make a promise to God that I’d try to want it. I just wanted it. I liked observing everything I could. I loved asking “why?” I was always trying to figure everything out.

At about this same time I realized that what I wanted was to be the world’s best father. I realized that this is the primary goal of every Christian man. Some guys think that they have to put their ”religion” above their family. I think that is flat wrong and a sin. It’s God, Family then Church. These guys that can barely feed their families but have a big library of theology books absolutely disgust me. They drive around in embarrasing cars. Their kids get made fun of because of their Goodwill clothes. Their wives can’t even afford decent makeup. They spend their time perfecting the art of thinning out powdered milk instead of just figuring out how to make more money. It’s quite absurd if you think about. The effort people go to to make due with what little they have. I’d rather use that same energy to just figure out how to make more money.

Anyway, I want my wife and kids to know that their father/husband takes care of them. That they do not lack for anything because “Daddy” is successful. They don’t have to understand anything about what I do. I just want to know that I take care of my family. This also includes my parents. I hope to be able to take care of them in grand style someday.

These religion-first types (notice I didn’t say God first) that put acting and looking religious before even their family end up dying broke. They saw their parents put in a nursing home with nothing they could do about it. When asked if they could help they always recited the laundry list of problems in their life that left them with no time, energy or money to help. This is NOT what the Lord wants.

I want to be like Abraham. If any of Abraham’s friends or family needed anything they could count on him to help. He always had the means. He was a hard worker. He didn’t just sit in a cave and pray. He used his brain and body that the Lord gave him to literally fight for what he wanted.

And that’s what I’m doing.

Yep folks. It looks almost certain that my Xterra will be paid off by the end of the year. Thanks to a what’s-it load of work that just got funding approved by a client of mine. The cool thing is that I’ll work about 4 weeks for myself and make the money that would have taken me almost 3 months to make working at Rubbermaid! Gotta love it!

So that’ll be cool because it should cut my monthly expenses by about 25%. Twill definately be a nice treat to not write that check every month! So now I’ll probably get in a wreck with a drunk guy on New Years eve and total the X! Yeeeeeea. Mmm, gotta love it. All I need now is a Dave Ramsey bobble-head to burn incense to. Or maybe I’ll go outside at 4am and do a blood-curdling Debt-Free Scream®. Lol!!!! Yea baby! But that’s really nothing. If I want to really show the world I’ll get a dog and name it Ramsey. Then I’ll name my first-born son David. Then I’ll shave my head and attend Financial PU with my groupie friends.

 Okay, Okay, Okay. I’m done now. He he he!

It’ll be real interesting to see what I’m up to in the middle of November. Right now I’m studying for 2 real estate certifications. Hopefully I’ll be dabbling in some real real estate by then. Right now I’m waiting for this guy at a mortgage brokerage to call me back and set up a test for me. He says he’s sooooo busy. Well then give me that test so I can pass it, get certified and help out!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Anyways.

It’s nice to be self-employed. When you don’t need money you don’t have to work! It’s quite nice. I think I’ve been working about 1 week a month since I quit my last corporate job. I feel so lazy. It’s funny how corporate America causes people to work their butts off while never getting ahead.

 When I started college I knew that if I could get my degree I’d be able to get a decent job. I don’t have that sense of surety with my Real Estate/Stock Market plan. Probably because I don’t want to have ‘decent’ results. I want to combine the wealth building power of a highly successful Real Estate investor with the wealth building power of a highly successful stock trader. I’m not going for pretty good here. I’m going for ‘highly successful’. If I pull this off (which will be evident in 3 years) it will mean major money. I see no reason why I can’t be a millionaire from stock trading by age 34. It can’t be as 35. 35 is way to old. When you are 35 you have a wife 3 kids and have no free time for anything because of family. 34, however is a much younger number.

 I just wish I’d gotten into this stuff a few years ago. Then I could be set by 30. Now however, I will only be proving that I have what it takes to be wealthy at 30, but not actually there yet. Oh well. What a difficult life if I’m only a millionaire at 34 and not a multi-multi-millionaire by then.

So what then? Then I’ll get on a plane to England. Take a ride way out to the countryside. Find a farmer to work for. This farmer will have pretty daughters with cute English accents. Then I’ll marry one and take her back to the states to live with me happily ever after.

 The End.